February 2011
An updated list of things I hate:
Everyone Everything Notice how it hasn’t changed over time.
Feb 1st
8 notes
hallucinogentleman asked: Hear me out here, okay? We're going to go get our limbs amputated and then replaced with prosthetic Barbie doll legs. Here's what makes this fabulous- They dispense glitter via built-in confetti cannons and shoot lasers. Also, they project the internet directly into our retinas and auto-tune any sound emitted within a 50 yard radius.
Feb 1st
1 note
Feb 1st
952 notes
January 2011
Jan 31st
640 notes
Jan 31st
1,009 notes
1 tag
hmm work an all nighter every night? or get up at...
Marry rich. Beautiful people don’t work. Send me dirty, pretty things.
Jan 31st
1 note
1 tag
Ever had a life changing moment? Mine started when...
So when’s it going to end, Romeo? Send me dirty, pretty things.
Jan 31st
1 note
3 tags
Jan 30th
23 notes
Jan 30th
508 notes
Jan 30th
33 notes
3 tags
Tonight is definitely an Amy Winebox night. I'm...
Jan 30th
5 notes
3 tags
Jan 29th
37 notes
Jan 29th
16 notes
Some guy tried spitting on me. People never cease...
Jan 28th
7 notes
3 tags
The only "drinking problem" I have is a lack of...
So get me a drink so I can tolerate you. Thanks.
Jan 27th
19 notes
4 tags
Jan 27th
11 notes
Love and Other Drugs...
like meth or crack rocks.
Jan 27th
2 notes
I just want to consummate my marriage.
And then eventually get married sometime down the line.
Jan 27th
3 tags
Jan 26th
77 notes
Bullet For My Valentine
My only Valentine is me… renaming the band “Suicide.”
Jan 25th
1 note
Who would win in a lesbattle, Whoopie Goldberg or...
Jan 24th
13 notes
Jan 24th
884 notes
Jan 24th
Anonymous asked: Its funny how you say you aren't a piece of meat when you are shirtless in all of your videos and all you talk about is sex.
Jan 24th
4 notes
4 tags
Jan 23rd
13 notes
3 tags
Jan 23rd
3 notes
What is happiness?
Jan 23rd
12 notes
Models look soul-less... it's beautiful.
Why can’t I look like that?
Jan 23rd
4 tags
Jan 23rd
2 notes
Jan 23rd
5 notes
Piecing together what happened last night is like...
Jan 21st
7 notes
2 tags
Drunk me better not fail calculus again this...
Jan 21st
3 notes
Jan 21st
2,173 notes
Last night was interesting.
1. I’m still trashed 2. What the fuck, and who the fuck, did I do? 3. My right ass cheek is sore.
Jan 21st
8 notes
3 tags
Jan 20th
10 notes
7 tags
Jan 20th
15 notes
Jan 20th
40,999 notes
If I said I wanted your body now would you hold it against me allow me to taxidermy your corpse?
Jan 19th
Anonymous asked: have you ever tasted your own cum?
Jan 19th
5 notes
Anonymous asked: have you ever tasted your own cum?
Jan 19th
Anonymous asked: spit, swallow or on your face?

if you answer correctly i'd be more than happy to be your husband!

(hey - you asked for dirty asks!)
Jan 19th
5 notes
Anonymous asked: spit, swallow or on your face?

if you answer correctly i'd be more than happy to be your husband!

(hey - you asked for dirty asks!)
Jan 19th
TMI Tuesday
Things I want right now: 1. A husband 2. Asks THOUSANDS OF THEM (make them raunchy, dirty, nasty, freaky, naughty etc.) I’d prefer the husband, but asks are acceptable too.
Jan 19th
4 notes
senoryassamin asked: i love your eyes!
haha and your face too :)
Jan 19th
senoryassamin asked: i love your eyes!
haha and your face too :)
Jan 19th
2 tags
Jan 19th
17 notes
1 tag
Jan 19th
6 notes
1 tag
Jan 18th
That awkward moment when someone calls you a...
Jan 18th
3 notes
3 tags
Mean Girls is my bible.
Jan 18th
11 notes